Thursday, January 6, 2011

I Am Positive About My Negativity

Today was a shitty day.

It really was.  I got some unpleasant news concerning a project I have been working on for quite some time that really got to me, laundry took forever and made it so that I couldn't go to yoga which I desperately need, a stand up gig I was told I was on the docket for hasn't gotten me any info so I have had to make other arrangements and I've been stuck in the house all day with nothing better to do that chores.

By anyone's standards, that's a shitty day.

But you know what, I will get over it.  I am not writing this as a self up, buck myself up kinda way.  No, I feel useless and overlooked at the moment and its perfectly fine that I feel this way.  Sometimes you just have to let yourself feel like someone has used you for the express purpose of beating the shit out of you.

I think we place too much emphasis in our society on being positive.  Yes, being positive is good and all, but if you don't allow yourself to feel those negative emotions that will inevitably come your way (because, come on, it's life) then all you will do is bury them until there is no where else to put them and they've gotten all rotted and festering and poisonous and the only way you can deal with them now is mass genocide.

I don't know about you, but I have enough trouble not committing murderous acts now with my feelings in halfway check.  I don't need more reason to have justifiable rage towards the world at large.

And you know what, if I feel bad, don't fucking tell me about people who have it worse.  That doesn't make me feel better.  Normally it might make me laugh, but right now it just pisses me off because you are in essence telling me that the way I am feeling is not worth your time.  If I have decided to open up to you, usually it means that I hold you in some high regard.  I won't be telling every other Tom, Dick and Harry about how I am feeling (she pontificates as she writes a public blog), and if you say, Ah well, you could have it worse, I'm going to say, No, YOU could have it worse!  Then stab you in the eye with an uncomfortable object.  Like a cat.

I have to go prepare for the odyssey that is folding laundry, so yeah.

  . . . . . .

Did you hear that witches and fortune tellers are going to be taxed in Romania?  Yeah, I didn't care either.

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